.
what if vriska was john’s really competetive gpa-bumper-sticker soccer mom
ok you know what nobody gave a shit about this post but i think about it a lot. like. imagine 7 year old john on a soccer team and vriska is his legal guardian and he wants to have fun with his friends and vriska wants him to KICK THE OTHER TEAMS ASS she laughs at all the other moms for having sub-par kids. her kid is the best. he is dressed the best. she dressed him. and his outfit is perfect. what’s YOUR kid wearing, trudy, are those legwarmers I see? some TIE-DYE? hahahahahahahaha
she brings better snacks to the games than the other moms. orange slices? orange slices are for fucking losers. vriska gets costco muffins and watermelon. take that, trudy. fucking trudy thinks she’s so great because her kid is a math prodigy. well can her kid play piano? I didn’t fucking THINK so.
vriska makes john throw a house party while she’s out of town so he’ll be popular instead of a weird nerd
‘aw mom’, he says
the year is 2014 AD. the human race has existed for over 200,000 years. men still think women pee out of the vagina.
neither do a lot of women
this is why I fear for the future of humanity
Frankly put. I am a FAKE GEEK GUY. I admit it. I like geek stuff, but I don’t love geek stuff. Not the way most geeks do. I’m an interloper on the geek scene. I’ve seen the movies, but I don’t know the canon. I am not a true fan.
All those things about not really loving the source material and “just watching the movies” or only reading the one book that everyone has read. That—all of that—applies to me.
But here are some things that have never happened to me. I have never been quizzed about who Data’s evil brother is to prove I like Star Trek. I have never had to justify my place in a midnight line to see Spider-man II by knowing who took up the mantle of Spider-man after Peter Parker’s death. (Peter Parker dies? Really? That’s so sad!) I have never had to explain who Nightwing is in order to participate in a conversation about Batman. (Nightwing is like….Robin on steroids, right?) I have never been asked how battle meditation works in order to voice my opinion that Enterprise shields would probably make a fight with Star Wars technology one sided. (Battle meditation is something that was in that Jedi role playing game, wasn’t it?) I have never had to beat everybody in the room (twice) at Mario Kart to prove I liked video games. I have never had my gender “honorarily” changed by having enough geek interests to be accepted (“you’re one of the guys now”). No one has ever insisted I tell them the difference between a tank and DPS in an MMORPG before allowing me to discuss raiding Molten Core. I have never been dismissed as a faker at a prequel screening because I didn’t know which admiral came out of light speed too close to the planet’s surface in The Empire Strikes Back. I have never been quizzed about Armor Class in order to get past someone who was blocking my path to the back of a game store where my friends were waiting at the tables. I have never been told I’m not a real fan. I have never been shamed for coming to a convention despite my lack of esoteric knowledge. And I have never, ever, EVER been invited to leave a fandom because I didn’t like [whatever it was] enough.
Every one of the things I have listed, I have personally witnessed happen. To women.
That’s not elitism. That’s sexism.
i went to look up coup de foudre (“love at first sight”) but i fucked up
i fucked up so much
i didn’t know it was possible to fuck it up this much
