theory evidence part four

007422 “GT: Last one of us to notch the vaunted one sixer. Its a big step! I knew youd make it, i always said i believed in you didnt i?
GT: Just kidding, the inexorable nature of times passage virtually assured you would get that old so you didnt really have anything to do with it. I mean not that i dont still believe in you, i do. ”

007451 “uu: HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE BECOMING FRIENDS. IF YOU RECOIL FROM MY OLIVE BRANCH.
uu: LIKE I’M FLAILING A WITHERED MUMMY’S SEVERED LIMB IN YOUR DIRECTION. ” that was a strange metaphor caliborn, where did you pick that up

007452 “THE MIRACLE OF HATRED”

007453 “uu: THE MASTERPIECE AFICIONADO WILL NOTICE. HOW I ACHIEVED THIS HIGHLY ADVANCED AND DIFFICULT SHAPE.
uu: WHAT MOST GIFTED ARTISANS WILL TELL YOU. IS THAT. CIRCLES ARE BASICALLY FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE TO DRAW.
uu: TRUST ME.
uu: IT’S LIKE A PARADOX. A SHAPE WITHOUT ANGLES. WHAT??
uu: SO I FUCKING CHEATED.
uu: I NAVIGATED THE IRRATIONAL PERIMETER BY MAKING A LOT OF EASILY UNDERSTANDABLE, TOTALLY LOGICAL MARKS. FORMING A WHOLE BUNCH OF LITTLE RIGHT ANGLES.
uu: THE CHEATING PART HAPPENS WHEN I DO THIS A LOT. SO IT GOES IN A ROUND DIRECTION.
uu: THIS ONE CAME OUT WELL I THINK. BUT THERE’S ROOM TO IMPROVE.
uu: I HAVE THEORIZED THAT IF I KEEP MAKING BOGUS CIRCLES LIKE THIS.
uu: WHILE DRAWING MORE AND MORE ANGLES. BUT SMALLER. SO SMALL THAT YOU START CAN’T SEEING THEM.
uu: THAT THE ILLUSION OF THE CIRCLE WILL BE COMPLETE! AND PEOPLE WILL BELIEVE IN THE FAKE CIRCLE. LIKE A BUNCH OF SUCKERS.
uu: I BET NOBODY HAS THOUGHT OF THAT CIRCLE STRATEGY. I THINK I’M THE FIRST AT THIS IDEA. AND BEST AT IT ALREADY. ” so not only is something like this happened previously, it will happen again via caliborn/lord english

007463 “She’s never copped to it, but you just know she’s got some schemes on the side. Every good right hand is gonna have something up its sleeve, some sort of contingency plan the boss doesn’t know about. Trust you on that one.” DD has a plan like this

007477 yea i’m going to paste the whole of wizardy herbert here
“"i think you were supposed to just tackle him,” beatrix said looking all kinds of put off.

wizardy herbert reached down to the body of the fictional camper he just shot and picked up the flag. “same difference.”

“IS it?”

“this is some lame magical version of capture the flag. the book wanted me to capture the flag from him. the flag has now been captured. anyway, hes just a kind of brainless puppet.”

“then what are we?” she asked.

“i dunno. brainless puppets whove spent a few years in the real world. kind of like everyone else, i suppose.”

“jeez thats cynical. anyway, youre the one who said we should let the story play out the way its supposed to. im just pointing out your own rules.”

“ehhh.” herbert made a dismissive gesture with his smoking gun. “these punks were starting to get on my nerves. we’re making progress anyway. see? listen to that. russets scene is coming up. if i remember right this is the one that introduces his recurring love interest. also i guess the chief bad guy. i mean, sorta.”

she listened. there was yelling through the woods. it was coming closer.

“help! herb! bea! where are you?!”
[wizardyherberttext1.png]
“"herbert – OW – will you do something? OWW! sunuva. this cant be right!”

herbert aimed carefully with his beretta at the head of russets assailant. he was way serious and stone cold about it. he was not going to miss.

BANG.

he missed. beatrix was grabbing his arm redirecting his aim. “herbert you have to stop!”

“why beatrix” he said with a super sly smile. “if i didnt know better, id say you were taking some enjoyment from watchin your dear pal russets smackdown.”

“what? no!” she didnt let go of his arm. but he wouldnt quit his douchey smile. she went on. “you cant just keep offing fictional characters. its… i dunno. irresponsible.”

“yeah yeah.”

“besides you know the scene is supposed to play out like this. russet is supposed to get rescued. how is he supposed to get rescued if the bullies are dead? you cant just go around changing things.”

“i guess youre right.”

herbert holstered his gun admiring a few more choice sucker punches to russets midriff. OOF. that onell leave a mark. beatrix regained her calm. “so whos this guy thats supposed to save him?” she asked. “you say hes the villain?”

“here he comes now.” “
[image 2]
"beatrix squinted at the serpenook boy. she didnt know why she couldnt see it coming. "grant??” “
[image 3]
”“a favor?” russet said. but he was barely listening. the resemblance to his real life friend was uncanny. he was sure it was him. but here in this dumb prison he was no more than a soulless mannequin dreamt up to recite insipid horseshit. “
[image 4]
"actually he said it like a zombie. "never. ill never betray my friends.” “
[image 5]
”“russet” he whispered. “
[image 6]
"the guy paused to remove his glasses and polished them on his sash. it came off as a seriously dramatic gesture, just as intended and also as explicitly stated in the text. ”
[image 7]

007478 “herbert and beatrix were dressed in fanciful athletic gear. thats what kids wear when theyre about to embark on a journey to compete in some irrational magic . herbert had tucked under his arm a big stitched up leather ball with golden springs poking out of it for no good god damn reason. it was called a skubbump. beatrix had propped on her shoulder this funnel thing to be worn as a glove called a gimmidge horn, a crucial appendage for any drudsel scooper worth her salt. theyd been selected probably for some valorous deeds they did to represent fort crowsnest in this highly whimsical event. russet was there too, but he didnt get chosen to play in the due to some poorly explained stuff that no reasonable person could possibly care about even if offered loads of cash. he was mainly jacked into the scene to wave goodbye and wish them luck which he begrudgingly did.

he also put in some time dodging questions and averting eye contact from his friends. he was being a champion at that.

"russet! answer me!” beatrix demanded. “why the heck didnt you tell us? or tell grant for that matter?”

herbert wasnt paying much attention. so russet was moody and cryptic and didnt tell people some stuff. what a bombshell. he worried at one of the springs poking out of his ridonkulous ball. it made a sproinging sound like a mouth harp and broke off. he wondered if the springs served any actual purpose. the springs did not serve any actual purpose.

“how could you keep something like that from everyone? that you knew all along?”

“i just wanted what was best for grant” he finally said.

she had tons of questions but couldnt settle on the next one to ask. she wasnt about to let good body language go to waste so she did kinda what mimes do when they dont like something you said. how long did he know grant was from this dogshit wizardfic? howd he escape in the first place? was it really his spell that sealed them here? how long had he been planning this? she guessed that would explain why he had an absurdly obvious pseudonym. grant anonama? yeah like THATS a real name. great job bro, or should she say SLINUS. she wondered if his bogus name wasnt an anagram for something. like a clue dangled under their noses. magic bad guys do love their anagrams. they are just so damn clever and when you finally figure them out its like whoa INSTANT MINDFUCK.

“hes quite a troubled person you know bea.”

herbert looked up from his skubbump. “well if RUSSET thinks so, then…”

she gave up on the interrogation. when youre dealt a shit sandwich why go to war over who baked the bread. russet could stuff his dumb secrets in a sack for all she cared. what did she ever see in this moping tool? she never thought she would long for those times before they met. the old questing days before all this started. she was never exactly psyched to watch herbert assault a crazy old wizard with a pistol but now… ok she wasnt saying she wanted to see any more wizards get shot. she just meant she would trade all the badges in the world to go back to when things were simpler.

it was time to go. the narratives invisible conductor let them know with the arrival of a carriage. it was drawn by two floating, perfectly immobile wooden horses. herbert read this thing a hundred times but still couldnt understand the authors fascination with flying rigid wooden horses.

herbert held open the door with a bow and gestured her in with ironic chivalry. the text didnt let it go unsaid that was meant as a big fuck you to russet thus keeping their rivalry brewing, but in truth neither dude was feeling it this time. beatrix got in and they were off. rigid horses, carriage and all into the sky. they turned around in their seats and waved to russet below, because a poorly written sentence said they were supposed to.

beatrix smacked her forehead.

“‘not an anagram’” she quoted from her brain.

“what?” he asked.

“that FUCKER”“ says SPORTS a bunch of times at the start

007479 "herbert took a swipe at the clumsy yet elusive skubbump. the orb ducked under his arm and shambled on its way like a husky beetle with some stuff to do over there. the crowd of almost-people roared generically at the almost-snatch. the maneuver if successful would have locked the score at ‘queen six love’ which REALLY would have been just. WOW. somethin else. possibly exciting? herbert still didnt quite understand the rules for the game. and judging by the antics of all the other boobs on their floating wooden horses, the author didnt either.

herbert struggled to turn his horse around to pursue the skubbump, but his mount of rigid lumber was unresponsive. as much as he reminded himself he just couldnt get used to fact that the story was in control of the horse. dead ahead was the leagues elite drudsel scooper, who was fussing with the laces on her gimmidge horn while her horse idled. she looked up.

"herbert watch where youre going!”

“i cant. i think the book wants us to crash.”

beatrix thought about it. she almost kicked the sides of her inert stallion to prod it along but caught herself. “do we really have to?”

herbert shrugged. another solid half minute of awkward horse advancement went by before the creaking oaken collision. herbert tumbled through the air and hit the grass pitch hard on his back. beatrix landed on top him. they found each other face to face.

“is she serious with this?” she asked regarding the hella subtle way the author decided to craft this situration*. situation. is was like, popetry in motion. plus hornses(???)

“im afaid* so. i think the story is builting romantic tension between us.”

“it IS?” it was not a question. but a statement of major concorn. *cern

“yeah. it it establushing* the groundwork for romance beween our characaters. its sort of the one token heroterosexual** romance in the book. we probably jush have to ride it out”

beautrix dinit* dint kno whaf*T the felling of collor red wash…. but

she cloun*cloud*COULD swear the fleling

she could swar

the felling

*FEEEEling

ws crepping

ontoo. herrrrrf.

face.

(RAAARARRAAUUUAAAAUUAGHGHGGHGGGGHHGH DOINT WRITE WHILT DRONK U LUSHEY DUMBO)“

007492 "twinkly herbert” (with like, suspicious quotation marks rather than quoty ones)

007494 “TG: (your soul is like)
TG: (presenting itself to my subconscious in the form of twinkly herbert)
TG: (or uhh)
TG: (maybe your soul was always in twinkly or)
TG: (oh man)
TG: (theories are hard i am being an embarrassment to science here) ”

007506 once again still don’t know what’s up with the house or the spiral

007507 also the house + surroundings turning white (white hole? white sun?)

007513 her “normal” dead eyes are black rather than white. are we sure she’s dead? (if she’s not, how is she turning into dead callie? muse of space powers?)

007514 “UU: this is not my trUe appearance. i have taken the form of my trollsona.
UU: i wanted to look more presentable for oUr meetUp. UnfortUnately my trUe visage woUld likely repUlse or frighten yoU.
UU: that is not the first impression i woUld like to make.
TG: girl please
TG: trust me theres nothing you could look like that would make me scared of you or grossed out
TG: i am your friend and i know youre nice inside no matter what, so
TG: could i see the real u?
UU: that is so kind of yoU to say. i can believe that a lovely person like yoU woUld be able to stop herself from recoiling at the sight of my monstroUs face.
UU: bUt it is oUt of the qUestion. i am mUch more comfortable appearing to yoU this way.
UU: really it has more to do with my own dissatisfaction with the way i look than any lack of trUst in yoUr character.
UU: yoU Understand, don’t yoU? ” idk maybe there’s more reasons calliope’s being callie, maybe not
“UU: yes. i have led yoU to a dream bUbble of my own design.
UU: my imagination and thoUghts dictate what yoU see here.
UU: as i told yoU earlier, my brother is hUnting for me. so i have created a little sanctUary in space to stay hidden from him.
UU: that is why i coUld not speak to yoU earlier. not oUt loUd at least. he is highly sensitive to my presence, so it is very easy for me to get his attention if i’m not carefUl.
UU: bUt as long as we stand in the centre of this vortex, we may speak as loUdly as we like! no information can escape this dark pocket, so long as i maintain it.
UU: and seeing as yoU are a hero of void, yoU make an ideal gUest to bring home for one who wishes to remain hidden. thoUgh i will say the fact that yoU are my best friend is a lovely bonUs. ^u^ ” muse of space powersssss

007515 “TG: isnt there some way we could bring you back
TG: some baller fuckin magic, or a bomb ass faeryspell
TG: i mean could we find an answer in like, for instance
TG: YE ENCHANTMENTES?
UU: very Unlikely. ” is this foreshadowing, is this what is going to happen when magic becomes real (or part of what happens)

also i’m not really sold on alt calliope being the ~ultimate weapon~ that seems kind of dodge to me

007516 kid coloured stars- why?
“UU: with victory yoU may finally exit this vast whirling storm.
UU: by claiming yoUr reward yoU woUld bring closUre to a very wide coil of caUsality, one not tracing a continUoUs path like a snake, bUt intricately woven like a wreath.
UU: a ring of coUntless little rises and falls, ascents and descents, on its way Up and down a pair of mUch bigger ones itself.
UU: from alpha to beta, then beta to alpha, as if a moUntain to be scaled and then climbed back down. its peak toUches the eye of a storm which cannot end Until the moment yoU all walk throUgh that door.
UU: only then will there be calm. ”

007517 “UU: yoU seem qUite cavalier aboUt this, roxy!
UU: don’t yoU have doUbts?
UU: woUldn’t it cross yoUr mind to wonder, "what if i never wake Up again?”
UU: i know it woUld for me.
TG: i guess thats a fair point
TG: but
TG: you say ill be fine right?
UU: yes. i believe yoU will.
TG: then thats good nuff 4 me
TG: i trust you
UU: …
UU: ^u^“ something calliope says will come back to haunt them probably is what i’m getting from this

007518 "UU: a fUlly realized rogUe of void can do remarkable things. things which even other god tiers woUld view as miracUloUs. ”

007525 anti sleeping majyyks

007528 “Oh, wonderful. A generous helping of glitter spills out of the document. You have been getting absolutely creamed with sparkly powder from eccentric alien broads lately. What’s up with that? ”

007536 “TG: i got this sweet ass ring
TG: its so fukkin magic you dont even know
TG: REAL magic i mean not the fake shit ” that’s the ring of void and maybe life isn’t it

007541 “TT: But as a sprite, you’ll have mobility and all sorts of crazy ass magic. Who knows what you could do. ”

007544 i feel like the shades cracking is a metaphor or something

007566 “TG: I D not G A fuck WHAT magic bling im rockin or how voidey im being”

007571 “GT: That maybe there is something special about me that nobody can understand. And maybe thats why i always seem to be botching things up the wazoo with my pals. ”
“uu: BECAUSE I’M NOT THE IDIOT KID I USED TO BE. NOW I KNOW. THAT WHAT IT TAKES FOR ME TO LEARN AND GROW STRONGER.
uu: IS EXCRUCIATING EFFORT.
uu: SO I HAVE A CHOICE. WHICH IS TO EITHER BE WEAK.
uu: WHEN WEAKNESS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.
uu: OR TO SUFFER. FOREVER. UNTIL NO ONE ELSE EXISTS.
uu: WHO IS STRONGER THAN ME.
uu: AND THAT’S YOUR CHOICE TOO.
uu: PAGE HUMAN ENGLISH. ” would that be your Choice then

007572 on the link is there blood on that cal head (like it’s been decapitated)

007573 “GT: Tell you about hope?
GT: Um well its something i think everyone should have in their hearts. ” jakedirkkkk
“GT: Hope to me is all about believing in stuff.
GT: If you believe in stuff then everything feels like its going to turn out ok.
GT: And if you believe in stuff with enough gusto i dare say it imbues that stuff with a pinch more chutzpah. Even the fake stuff!
GT: And then if you keep an open mind and adventurous spirit, that chutzpah flows directly into your heart, and thats when YOU have the power.
GT: So i think if hope grants one the power to smite villainy and vanquish hooligans thats probably where it comes from!
uu: NO.
uu: OH GOD. NO.
uu: THAT IS ACTUALLY THE WORST THING I’VE EVER READ.
uu: THAT CAN’T BE RIGHT. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT.
GT: Well THERES your problem dude. You dont want to BELIEVE!
GT: Just let go and believe in things. Then youll find you had the power in you all along.
uu: YOU ARE SO DUMB. I JUST KEEP CAN’T BELIEVING IT. HOW TRULY STUPID YOU ARE.
uu: WHATEVER. FORGET I ASKED.
uu: I’M SURE YOU’LL FIND OUT WHAT HOPE IS REALLY ABOUT. INSTEAD OF THAT INSIPID BULLSHIT.
uu: ONCE YOU BECOME A GOD TIER.” jesus christ jake are you literally saying things with the exact purpose of confirming my theories holy shit

007574 “uu: ANYWAY. A JUJU IS A MAGICAL THING. IT HAS NO REAL BEGINNING OR END.
uu: THEY’RE JUST ALWAYS AROUND. THERE FOR YOU.
uu: YOU GROW UP WITH THEM. AND THEY BRING YOU COMFORT. AND YOU NEVER QUESTION THEIR EXISTENCE.
uu: IT’S LIKE SOME OF THE SHIT YOU HAD IN YOUR ROOM AS A KID. EXCEPT NOT USELESS GARBAGE. AND MORE MAGICAL.
uu: THEY ALWAYS HAVE RULES. AND THEY ALWAYS HAVE OWNERS.
uu: YOU CAN TAKE SOMEONE’S JUJU. IF THE OWNER WAS KILLED.
uu: OR IF HE GIVES IT TO YOU FREELY. LIKE I’M DOING.
uu: SO I WILL GIVE YOU THE CODE TO MAKE IT YOURSELF.
uu: ONCE YOU DO. IT SHOULD DISAPPEAR FROM MY CHEST. AND IT WILL NO LONGER BE MINE.”

007575 “GT: So what sort of magical properties does your juju have?
uu: I DON’T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT IT DOES.
uu: I HAVE NEVER TRIED IT. BECAUSE IT WAS TOO PRECIOUS TO ME.
uu: WHATEVER MINE DOES. MY SISTER’S PROBABLY DOES THE OPPOSITE THING.
uu: BUT WHAT THEY DO INDIVIDUALLY. PALES IN COMPARISON TO WHAT THEY CAN DO TOGETHER.
uu: WHEN COMBINED. THE JUJUS BECOME THE MOST MAGIC THING EVER.
uu: THEY CAN MAKE ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE. AND EVERYTHING THAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN. WILL MAGICALLY FALL INTO PLACE.
GT: Really?
GT: That sounds almost too good to be true.
GT: If you dont even know what your juju does by itself why do you think they do that together?
uu: BECAUSE I BELIEVE IT WITH ALL MY FUCKING HEART. YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT.
GT: Oh why didnt you say so! Thats all i needed to hear!!!
GT: See youre getting the hang of hope already. ”
“uu: BUT WHAT CAN YOU DO? NOTHING, I HAVE LEARNED. HE’S A CLOWN. THE RULES ARE. CLOWNS CAN DO WHATEVER THEY WANT. BECAUSE OF MIRACLES. AND HOLD NO ACCOUNTABILITY FOR THEIR DEEDS.
uu: I DON’T LIKE IT. BUT THOSE ARE THE RULES. ”

007576 “uu: BECAUSE I DID NOT HAVE A CHANCE. TO GAZE SOULFULLY INTO HIS BEAUTIFUL EYES.
uu: AND COMMUNE WITH THE DOLL. IN A PERSONAL AND INTIMATE WAY.
GT: Gosh…
GT: That might just be the gayest thing ive ever heard.
uu: THANK YOU.
uu: YOUR HUMAN CONCEPT OF GAYNESS. ADEQUATELY DESCRIBES THE FEELINGS I HAVE. WHEN I EMBRACE MY PERFECT FLOPPY LITTLE MAN.
uu: THE THING IS. I UNDERSTAND HIM MORE NOW.
uu: BEFORE I THOUGHT HE WAS A CURSED VESSEL OF MISFORTUNE. WHICH SEEMED EERILY EMPTY TO ME.
uu: HE WAS HOLLOW. NOT YET FILLED WITH BAD JUJU.
uu: AND LOOKING IN HIS EYES NOW. I SEE. THAT I WAS RIGHT. ALMOST.
uu: HE IS EMPTY RIGHT NOW. BUT A JUJU FOLLOWS A LONG AND WINDING PATH ON ITS ETERNAL JOURNEY.
uu: AND HE WILL NOT BE EMPTY FOREVER.”

007577 “
uu: SOMEWHERE ALONG HIS JOURNEY.
uu: IN SOME WAY I DON’T UNDERSTAND YET.
uu: HE WILL STOP BEING EMPTY.
uu: AND HIS CURSE WILL COME TO LIFE.
uu: AND WHEREVER HE GOES. TO WHATEVER UNIVERSE OR PLANE OF REALITY.
uu: ALL WHO EXIST THERE. WILL EXPERIENCE NOTHING BUT MISERY AND DEATH.”

007578 “uu: BECAUSE NOW I KNOW. THROUGH INTENSIVE COMMUNION WITH THIS PRECIOUS MYSTICAL PUPPET.
uu: THAT THE CURSE WHICH WILL BLOSSOM IN HIS FLUFFY HEART. WILL DO SO.
uu: BECAUSE OF ME!”

007579 “uu: I CAN’T EXPLAIN IT.
uu: BUT WHEN I LOOK DEEP INTO HIS EYES.
uu: I CAN FEEL HIM OUT THERE.
uu: IN LATER STAGES OF HIS LIFE.
uu: BY WHICH I MEAN.
uu: I CAN FEEL *MYSELF*.
uu: THROUGH HIM SOMEHOW.
uu: AS IF MY ESSENCE WILL ONE DAY BECOME.
uu: ENTANGLED WITH THE VOID.
uu: AND THEN MYSTERIOUSLY ACCESSIBLE.
uu: THROUGH MY SOFT HAPPY PAL.” that’s some blatant foreshadowign there

007580 “uu: AND ALL THOSE ALONG THE WAY.
uu: WHO HE DEEMS WORTHY.
uu: OF ACCEPTING INTO HIS CUSTODY.
uu: IF THEY SHOULD DARE TO FONDLY GAZE.
uu: INTO HIS SPARKLING BABY BLUES.”

next two pages it’s they will be staring “INTO MY HIDEOUS SOUL” (showing gamzee looking in lil cal’s eyes in wonder)

007592 “You don’t care HOW magic it is. He can take his stupid juju and shove it up his patoot. ”

007594 “it has some magical properties, bUt nothing too fancy on its own.”

007602 calliope’s juju code creates a lime green lollipop/sucker which momentarily has a white snake thing on (half of the aurin i think maybe?) and one zillion (?) grist

007603 item is called “green sucker” and costs negative 1 zillium

007604 caliborn’s is similar but red and reversed snake thing in black not white, also gamzee is watching

007606 both suckers are shown in a kind of anti aliased art style, not the normal one. text reads “S u c k e r s ?” in green on red reminiscent of doc scratch’s message to gamzee. “Yes, suckers.

What’s so magical about these things? You guess you’re supposed to lick them. But what magic thing could possibly happen if you lick these, and what’s so special about having both of them?? Jujus are so mysterious.

Wait… they seem to be attracted to each other. Like magnets. Whoa. Very STRONG magnets!” STRONG like equius?

007607 they go together in a red/green spiral, which momentarily flashes both snakes. “The jujus snap together to form a single SPIRAL SUCKER.

The urge to lick it is suddenly overwhelming.”

007608 “It looks so delicious. You are presumably being compelled to lick the sucker by some powerful juju enchantment. But it’s making you nervous. You must resist!”
the background is red and green, split by the sucker. there is more red than green and jane is on the red side.

007611 blehhhh trickster mode

007612 the entire planet instantly becomes covered in plant life. all the monsters explode into zillium grist. seems like an overload of life powers

007614 jane floats past cherub looking things (baby looking cherubs, not homestuck cherubs) their faces look kind of like the one on the end of the warhammer of zillyhoo (which seems to turn up a lot). then there are some horrorterrors and some actual homestuck cherubs, with black and white wings. caliborn looks on really happily. gamzee facepalms. jane goes through a portal (?) or something. i have no idea hwat any of this means.
mashing space like it says to: jane hits the stuff going past with the sucker. the baby cherubs turn into zillium. the horrorterrors turn into squiddles. the cherubs turn into lil cal.

notes on trickster mode: first the caucasian thing, that could be relevant later. i don’t even know it’s kind of a whole different thing to what most people get mad about in homestuck

007616 text colour is flashing between light blue, pinkish, and white. looks kind of like special stardust. notably all tricksters talk like this with no distinguishing text colours. haven’t seen any trickster trolls so idk if they’d still do quirks. interesting in relation to caliborn’s apparent difficulty reading text of similar colours? also in this whole bit the ==> is replaced with the combined sucker. (although the thing up the top is still ==>)

007619 TOTALLY REMOVES INHIBITIONS (jane repeatedly says she loves jake. “I ALWAYS DID LOVE YOU!
BUT I WAS TOO AFRAID TO SAY SO!
BUT NOW I’M NOT!
[…]
I WAS SO SAD BEFORE!
BUT NOW I’M HAPPY!!!”
possibly not so much inhibitions as totally increasing romantic stuff?? she then kind of forces herself on him like ‘LET’S KISS!“ and then get married and have babies which is really over the top and kind of scary. it seems kind of like it could be a subversion of that thing where love is like the ~ultimate answer~ to basically everything- like here it’s kind of toxic and overpowering

007621 jane feels "SO ALIVE”

007624 apparently being kicked in the balls by a trickster makes you go trickster. there seems to be a definite connection here with tricksters and obsessive/overbearing love and kind of adult themes (not overtly adult, like in really brave disney movies)

007627 apparently jane and jake are going to have “A ZILLION” babies. (could be interesting given a zillion can be considered a single object, as in zillion grist)

007630 i sympathise with roxy here. also they solved all their personal problems apparently? not really i don’t think

007632 jane plans on making roxy go trickster by kissing her

007634 jake makes a pumpkin appear with a what pumpkin style question mark on in trickster text colour/s. looks to appear with lightning kind of like first guardian thing, but instead of appearing green it’s red/orange/maybe yellow or purple
this could relate to roxy’s ability to make stuff appear tht’s revealed later. also, he appears a pumpkin. a pumpkin. (doesn’t roxy make pumpkins or something?) notably *appearing* a pumpkin is in complete violation of all the logic of mspa

007635 jake’s eye’s go from looking like a recoloured version of cal’s eyes to red/green swirls

007636 jane’s eyes are swirly too and they suddenly seem able to see roxy even though she’s invisible

007651 dirk thinks roxy is “magically insane”

007653 holy shit that’s the ring of void/life isn’t it
roxy wanting dirk to put it on/saying it’s a “WEDDIN RING!!!!!!!!!” seems to be a theme here of the thing beign a wedding ring, tavros also wanted it for that
also it’s really creepy that she’s forcing it on him like what would that even do

007658 so jane licked the lollipop, jake got kicked (in the balls i think), roxy got a pumpkin on her head, and dirk got kissed by roxy
there doesn’t seem to be much of a pattern here

007659 “a**hole candy magic”

007664 “You round up an assortment of ordinary household weaponry and begin to recreate a series of legendary weapons from the seven continents of a magical kingdom from cherubim folklore. The name of the kingdom is a well guarded secret, traded only by the cunning ninnywizards in hushed giggles. If you beheld this kingdom – if you even knew its name – you would understand stupidity no human ever has. For it is said that any mortal who listens to its melodious, perfectly absurd syllables will achieve instantaneous dumblightenment.

Each legendary weapon is named after the continent it was created in. But no one in the kingdom knows which name belongs to what continent, not even the wizards. The subjects frequently ask each other which continent they’re on, and as such every conversation tends to sound like an Abbott and Costello routine. Some have even speculated that the vaudevillian comedy duo are the kingdom’s mirthful messiahs, but that is a matter of heated debate among the federation of baloneyscholars.”
with a picture of what appears to be a world map done in zillyhoo yellow with pink mountains and blue stripy sea. every so often there’s a picture of a happy caliborn with “WORLDBUILDING.” written on. (happy caliborn is never a good thing)
i’m pretty sure this is the first time we see the mysterious worldbuilding thing. i know it has to be important but i have no idea how, it’s so annoying.
(also, the bottom left continent kind of looks like a crocodile. the top middle/left one looks like a fat dragon if you squint. the top one has a lake kind of like a horseshoe. all of these are probably unintentional.)

007665 “There she is. Forged in fire by the smiths of Pipplemop, commissioned by the sage Lord of the Wozzinjay Fiefdom in the Realm of the Snargly Fruzmigbubbins,

You made…

THE WARHAMMER OF ZILLYHOO”

007666 “Plucked from the revered utensil drawer of none other than the Chieftain of the Trifletoot Clan himself, polished to a gleam in his loincloth by his devoted Abecedarian Buttersquire,

Behold.

THE BATTLESPORK OF ZILLYWUT”

007667 “Each was hand crafted by the seniormost Artillery Hermit of the hallowed Schundermoist Caves, to be mounted in times of peace upon the Royal Burblemonk’s personal Placard of Dwib,

Lo:

THE FLINTLOCKS OF ZILLYHAU”

007668 “
Swashed from the buckles of the rough’n tumble Bellyjape Seamen and offered atop the kingdom’s last known wildly occurring pluffy dimplepillow to the resplendent 1st Rumbylumplewiffig of the Horsehorsehorse Administration,

I give you ->

THE CUTLASS OF ZILLYWAIR” the horsehorsehorse adminstration

007669 “Cast from the most priceless squippyclink ores mined from the famous whooping volcanoes owned and curated by the distinguished Maximillion Hotpocket Puckershuttle Junior, and then packed to the brim with the hilarious traveling Grief Miser’s explosive winklepork snuff,

*Ta da*

THE BLUNDERBUSS OF ZILLYWIGH”

007670 “A real hard sword for a real hard dude. It was said to be forged by a Japanese master over the heat of a roaring manga fire. It was cooled in an enchanted spring where virgin horses bathe, and

Yeah this is still just Dirk’s sword.” costs one zillion the same as the others

007671 “Flippety dippety doo bup bup shrubber double floppy mumblescurry noodlescoop pizzabubble pizzabubble mip mip mip mip mip mip.

Check it out.

THE THISTLES OF ZILLYWICH”

007672 “For good measure, you decide to make ZILLYWAVE and SAWHOO.

Just to be on the safe side.

Some day you’ll look back on this decision and say thank god I did that.

What next?” this is very very clear foreshadowing and that is SO SO ANNOYING bc in what possible situation will this have been a good decision

007677 THAT IS TERRIFYING WHAT THE HELL (zilly santa has one red one green eye (liv tyler?) with red/green swirls in + trickster coloured swirls on cheeks, also demonic expression but that might be normal for fancy santas)

007678 “You return to the safety of ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 1. You finally slip out of the fabled peachbirth trance of the jokebollocks, and cease quaking in the foodsandwich throes of the goofjester tongues, stubborn though they were.

Let us never speak of ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 2 again.

WHAT THE FUCK.

?

JUST.

WHAT.

What what.

NO.” stuff in caps is caliborn. apparenlty he liked hte trickster stuff? (did he write it? that seems a definite possibility now i think of it)

007679 “OR I GUESS. AN "ACT ACT ACT”?
ARGH. I HATE THE THINGS I’M FORCED TO SAY. AND ACKNOWLEDGE AS REAL. BECAUSE OF YOU. “
"Do you really think I have the power to make something unhappen??
I would have to be a wizard to do that. And as we both know perfectly well, magic is fake as shit. ” if jake makes everything that just happened in canon unhappen holy shit
wait
what if he makes the whole of homestuck not happen
“And incidentally, I didn’t authorize you to send that lollipop.
OH, WHAT. YOU DON’T APPROVE OF MY JUJU?!
Approve of kids doing something kinda like drugs and making dumb plans to get quadruple married and have babies?
No, I don’t approve of that.
Besides, that’s no way to make progress.
You don’t just give the heroes some cheap game breaking candy let them blast through the whole adventure and all their personal issues.
That’s some deus ex machina shit you were trying to pull.
YEAH RIGHT. MORE LIKE.
DELICIOUS EX MACHINA! ”

007680 didn’t catch the exact wording because of that godawful crowbar but i don’t think caliborn has realised he’s a fictional character yet

007681 “See, you cherubs are predisposed to love all this trickster crap. All that goofy squeaky candy coated nonsense is a critical part of your people’s mythos.”
hussie also refers to the lollipop as “magic” later. and says the mario super star is magic a couple times.

007690 jake’s got his helmet on for some reason (probably as a narrative way for him to talk to people)

007692 “GG: I think it fell into the crypt.” about the lollipop. there’s NO WAY this will become important later.

007696 “GG: And if only we just had some cake and wore some hats and I blew out all the candles in one big puff, we could pretend all the problems we had with each other would magically stop existing.
GG: And the most horrifying thing of all is, I actually got my wish! ”

007696 “GT: You know how you think you know these things about yourself?
GT: Like all these personal attributes about you as if theyre written down somewhere like a sort of mini biography so they have to be true.
GT: So you just believe them and hope that the believing is what makes them true.
GT: But then you spend so much time believing those things and taking their truth for granted that you somehow forget to MAKE them true with your words and deeds.
GT: How can i truly love adventure when i never even knew what it was?
GT: I dont think its raiding tombs and clobbering scoundrels.
GT: That stuffs fun and all but thats not what adventure is.
GT: Adventure is…
GT: Its something else.
GT: Its doing the things im genuinely afraid to do.
GT: But cant.
GT: Because im a coward. ” this seems to kind of conflict with my theory so i need to think about it more.
so like apart from believing something is true, you have to do stuff that makes them true i guess?

007698 “TG: am i cursed or somethin jane?
GG: Cursed?
TG: yeah
TG: its like
TG: i always seem to accidentally kill my cats
TG: or my half cat girls
TG: ummm
TG: who are part sea princess and also an alien ghost
TG: i dunno maybe this line o speculation has no particular coherence ”

007702 “TG: so whatd i do the moment jake snuck up and owned me with that magic pumpkin? ”

007704 felt cal + crowbar’s crowbar. the weird ass shit i don’t 100% understand is about to happen isn’t it

007706 the you’re welcome thing is gamzee

007708 1. jack’s eyes having little cal eyes in. glowing lord english colours. he’s also drooling a bit
2. cal’s (jack’s cal) eyes flashing between red and blue
3. caliborn staring at cal. his eyes have red/green swirls in them.
4. caliborn’s cal has normal blue with red/green swirl instead of pupil

007710 1. jack’s eyes are still doing the glow thing. they also are kind of going round and have little cue balls in them
2. jack’s cal’s eye(?s) are cue balls
3. caliborn is the same as before just zoomed in a bit
4. caliborn’s cal’s eye(s?) have gone full swirl

007712 jack stabs knives into his eyes. his whole body gets the le colour glow.
“TG: that ring tho
TG: what happened to it do you remember?
GT: Not really.
TG: god damn it
TG: must of lost it when i was a FUCKING trickster ”

007714 jack’s cal’s eye sockets are empty. jack has sawed off his leg (the one with the manacle on). he’s holding the crowbar and the glow has gone from a minor gradient to full on first guardian like
“TG: i just really liked that ring
TG: kinda spoke to me in a way
TG: hehe
TG: want to know something lame?
GT: Yes.
TG: the moment i first saw that ring
TG: i was like in my head
TG: thinkin
TG: some day i want to give that ring to the person i marry ”

007716 lord english coloured explosion takes out half of prospit. it looks kind of more stylised than usual and has some lines kind of like those cracks in reality

007718 the explosion is looking a lot like a laser now for some reason

007720 THE APPEARENCE OF UNIN JACK/JACK ENGLISH/HWATEVER . he has cue ball eyes.

007722 there goes prospit

007736 condesce has eye lasers, jack has a mouth laser

007744 as the moons are destroyed and presumably the kids die and go god tier the lights in the twoer on jane’s land go incredibly bright and then explode, which is interesting since when jake’s dream self died i’m pretty sure it just faded out

007746 GOD TIER YEEEEEAAAAHHHH

007748 the fire looks kind of trickster coloured

007788 condy uses vriska/tavros mind control to make jade go grimbark

007792 green sun looking eyes, black text

007800 still don’t know if this is grimdark or not. it’s definitely mind control.

007802 the circuit-like theme could be relevant seeing as homestuck is entirely an electronic medium

007804 red eyes, red text

007814 red CURCUIT eyes

007837 “DAVE: i mean pretty much all religions are wrong but theres wrong and then theres WRONG
DAVE: as in ZERO CHANCE YOU ARE EVER PROVEN RIGHT ABOUT EVEN A SINGLE THING DUDE, EVER EVER EVER ” oh nooo this is foreshadowing isn’t it

007843 “DAVESPRITE: whats that ring anyway
DAVESPRITE: ive seen you with that ring before and i guess i was just like
DAVESPRITE: ok john has a magic ring for some reason ”
“DAVESPRITE: fuck it ill just leave another one of my patented magic notes taped to your shoe or your cowlick or something
DAVESPRITE: my magic notes rule ill miss leavin em taped on stuff”

007848 the cracks are nearly a full circle around the green sun
(actually if it was a full circle it would look kind of like an eye and that would be so freaky woah)

007857 “MEENAH: maybe some day ill find an heiress who my genes dont instinctively make me wanna murder on sight
MEENAH: then i can teach her the badass ways of being a boss n shit! ” jaaaaane

007861 caliborn worldbuilding thing as aranea starts expositing on cherubs

007862 “good” cherub looks kind of hopeful

007865 also looks like she’s flying w/ lime green stuff. like vriska’s fairy trail or first guardian thing only it looks different from both.

007866 “While those inha8iting an evil cheru8’s territory will regard it as an unpredicta8le tyrant, those in the territory of a good cheru8 will likely come to view it as a protector, waiting quietly for millenia in deep space, ready to attack any encroaching threat. In that sense, they are not unlike cells in a universal immune system.”
so sburb is frog reproduction and cherubs are immune system/?viruses
this would kind of fit with cherubs not being supposed to play as well seeing as obviously the immune system should not be used for reproduction

007868 “Cheru8s typically seek out 8lack holes as the setting for their m8ting ritual. 8ut not any 8lack hole. Once long ago it was a star, and circling that star was a planet. That planet was home to one of the presently sparring cheru8s. ”

007870 “The m8tes will then duel as two vast frightening serpents, each an astronomical unit in length.” firstly there’s porn of this
also an astronomical unit (au) is an actual unit of length, the distance between the earth and the sun

007871 “The tangled struggle 8etween the green aus is exceedingly 8rutal and can last for sweeps. While dueling in such a monstrous form, their energy is inexhausti8le. The transform8tion taps into the cheru8s’ latent connection with the enigmatic forces presiding over all that is eternal, and perme8ting all those endowed with immortality. Normally this power is only accessi8le to them during m8ting. In this form, they are only a8le to 8e injured 8y one another, and are otherwise indestructi8le. Hence the ritual can never 8e stopped 8y an outside force until it is complete.” it looks like lord english energy. also, permeating all those endowed with immortality? either god tiers don’t count or this is important

007872 “Upon defeating her m8 she initi8ted the interlocking form8tion to complete the coupling, while assuming the dominant position, a stance undetecta8le to all 8ut the most astute o8servers of the zoologically du8ious. Consequently, the male was fertilized with the young.” auryn/ouroboros shape with her head at the top. also, the black hole is in the middle.

007875 “A fascin8ting thing a8out cheru8 reproduction is how the parent’s alignment is passed on to the young. If the male lays the egg, the alignments of the child’s two halves will 8e the same as the parents. If the female lays the egg, the alignments will 8e flipped, and the young male and female halves will 8e endowed with opposite alignments of the parents. ” this seems kind of unrelated so it could become relevant later

007876 “8arring a highly impro8a8le glitch in causality, it would 8e almost impossi8le for her to predomin8te over someone like him. And even so, he didn’t have the patience to w8. Unfortun8tely for everyone to ever exist, he discovered a way to predomin8te early. Yet it was not this act alone that would prove ominous, so much as the means through which it was achieved. He was allowed to 8ecome the solo player of a game which his kind was never meant to play. ”

007883 trickster text colour egg goop
“Or the moment his 8eing was inexplica8ly confined to a juju, allowing him access to any realm in which his vessel would capriciously materialize. ”

007891 broken chessboard with red king and green pawn on the top and red rook and green queen. according to wiki calliope plays white and caliborn black so this is black king, rook and white queen, pawn

007896 the door that presumably leads to yaldabaoth (has a pic of him on it) looks like doc scratch’s clock. we still have no idea what’s up with that thing. also time symbols and pictures of echidna

007897 yaldabaoth is a massive snake with light for a head
“ARANEA: His choices are known for their wild extremes.
ARANEA: And to this player, in this session, he offered his most extreme choice of all.
ARANEA: It was the choice 8etween a path of conquest, and a path of sacrifice.
ARANEA: 8ut this is putting it lightly.
ARANEA: In a tongue only his player could understand, he descri8ed what the path of the martyr entailed.
ARANEA: In short, it involved nothing.
ARANEA: The player chooses to walk away from the tempt8tion of power. To surrender all am8ition, and to welcome death.
ARANEA: In exchange for this pledge comes a promise. The player’s sacrifice is assured to 8enefit all who will ever live.
ARANEA: In death, the player would later 8e in the position to help 8ring an end to a force of unfathoma8le evil and destruction.
ARANEA: A force which was unleashed, for instance, 8y someone who once opted for the other choice.
ARANEA: Yalda8aoth then descri8ed what it meant to choose the path of the conqueror.
ARANEA: It was a path for a more active player, to 8e sure. The player’s mettle as a conquering force would 8e tested directly, and repeatedly.
ARANEA: One 8y one, he would have to conquer and destroy a num8er of planets spawned for him in the session. Each would 8e more difficult than the last.
ARANEA: After destroying them all, his true land would 8ecome unlocked.
ARANEA: He would then return to face his denizen again, and defeat him in com8at.
ARANEA: If successful, his reward would 8e unprecedented.
ARANEA: He would receive the 8oon of unconditional immortality, where resurrection would not 8e linked with the just or heroic nature of death.
ARANEA: It is unclear how this 8oon would 8e awarded, since to my knowledge it is 8eyond even the a8ility of a denizen to allow this.
ARANEA: 8ut through whatever mechanism the 8oon is 8estowed, immortality is only the 8eginning.
ARANEA: The player is somehow also im8ued with a limitless supply of power. Enough to destroy anything he wanted, for as long as he wanted.
ARANEA: And knowing the villain of our story, anything he wanted would be everything. And as long as he wanted would be forever.
ARANEA: Yes, knowing our villain, the choice he would make is quite clear.
ARANEA: Knowing him, in fact, proves it could hardly 8e considered a choice at all.”

007901 on the previous page aranea describes billiards. on this page three balls/planets fall into the black hole: 7/crowbar, 11/matchsticks, 14/quarters. apparently these are the felt members dead at the start of the intermission

007906 “ARANEA: For instance, I can and have given lectures for weeks at a time on their marvelous and widely varying magical a8ilities. ”

007917 “KARKAT: WHAT IS SHE, SOME SORT OF MAGIC FAIRY??
TEREZI: UM. Y3S?
TEREZI: TH4TS K1ND OF L1T3R4LLY WH4T SH3 1S ” about aranea

007920 “KARKAT: SO IT NEVER LETS YOU FORGET ABOUT THEM. BECAUSE THEY WERE ALL CRITICAL TO THE BIG PICTURE, AND ALL YOUR PAST FLAWS ARE LIKE…
KARKAT: SCARS.
KARKAT: SCARS IN SPACETIME THAT NEVER HEAL, AND ALWAYS SERVE TO REMIND YOU THAT THE PERFECT VERSION OF YOURSELF YOU WISH YOU COULD BE CAN NEVER EXIST. BECAUSE THE SURVIVAL OF EVERYONE YOU CARE ABOUT DEPENDS ON HIM NOT EXISTING. ”

007927 “ARADIA: they consider this to be a great clash between good and evil
ARADIA: but i prefer to look at the coming battle as a matter of housekeeping
ARADIA: in the end all loops must be tidied up
ARADIA: even his ”
“ARADIA: but i am not nor will i ever be the monsters handmaid ”
“ARADIA: as such it seems to me his rampage is just another kind of housekeeping
ARADIA: while he rounds the ring undoing the work of the gods we must prepare for his undoing as well
ARADIA: to ready the manor for the lords arrival so to speak :)”
we’ve sort of been ignoring the horrorterrors lately. but we still don’t really know jack shit about them.

007928 “ARADIA: i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart”

007933 “ARANEA: Details on the rings are quite hard to come 8y. I have pieced together what little I know from various fa8les and myths.
ARANEA: They occasionally make appearances in such stories, serving different purposes in each tale, and always called 8y different names.
ARANEA: 8ut in this story, they will 8e known as the Rings of Life and Void.” fables aren’t real, aren’t they

007934 “ARANEA: The rings are said to look nearly identical.
ARANEA: 8ut their powers are quite different, as are their origins.
ARANEA: The Ring of Void supposedly once 8elonged to the 8lack queen of a void session.
ARANEA: 8ut one day it was stolen from her 8y a thief. And then stolen again from the thief 8y a rogue.
ARANEA: Legend would suggest it changed hands like this for a long time thereafter, until finally vanishing into the void itself forever.
ARANEA: Which is fitting, as the ring grants its wearer the a8ility to do exactly the same!
ARANEA: The Ring of Life has a very different story.
ARANEA: I have found no reports of an origin to this ring at all. Like many magic artifacts, it may not even have one which is comprehensi8le.
ARANEA: Earliest reports I have read would suggest it was first discovered 8y some travelers in a desert, and like its sister ring, has changed hands repeatedly since.
ARANEA: This ring however has a dramatically different effect. Instead of releg8ting the wearer to o8scurity and immateriality, it does just the opposite.
ARANEA: It is said that any ghost who wears this ring will come 8ack to life!
ARANEA: In some stories, the f8 of each ring appears to 8e entangled with the other. When one is lost, the other is serendipitously found. ”
presumably these are the same two rings, that the black queen in the B2 session had. also the picture here has them linked together in a way that might be reminiscient of the auryn thing (maybe, should look it up). one is glowing dark green, with the same colour off to the side, with the other void/aranea coloured (can’t really tell which) (the green looks kind of jake or le ish though)

007941 “TAVROS: yOU TALK ABOUT ORANGE GUY, bUT, iN REALITY, hE SOUNDS PROBABLY FAKE?
TAVROS: lIKE HOW YOU THOUGHT RUFIOH USED TO BE, uNTIL FACTS PROVED HE WASN’T, ”

007942 “VRISKA: Well whatever lame reason you wanted that ring, forget it. It’s o8viously a much more important magical item than either of us gave it credit for. ” once again with the ring being magic

007947 “JOHN: it seems to have the power to come with me in and out of my dreams, as long as i’m wearing it. ”

“JOHN: i liked it, and i just wanted to hang on to it for some reason. ” tavros said something similar with the lotr references.

007952 “VRISKA: It was supposedly a weapon that once 8elonged to him.
VRISKA: 8ut he could never use it without altering its nature.
VRISKA: Meaning he could only use it once.
VRISKA: So he did.
VRISKA: After that, it could only 8e used again one more time.
VRISKA: And only as a weapon against him.
VRISKA: Knowing it was one of the keys to his defeat, he had it locked away deep in the void. ” the plot hole. i don’t know how it being a literal hole in the comic fits with anything but i sure hope we find out

007953 “VRISKA: I only ever wanted to do the right thing no matter how it made people judge me, and I don’t need a magic ring to do that. ”

007965 “THEY’RE ALL MEN. BECAUSE I SAY THEY ARE. AND I WANT THEM TO BE.
IF I BELIEVE HARD ENOUGH IN THEM BEING MEN.
THEN THAT FACT BECOMES ABSOLUTELY INDISPUTABLE AS A PERMANENT MAN REALITY.
It does? ”

007966 as the over the top dramatic “SOMETHING OMINOUS IS HAPPENING” music informs us kurloz picking up vriska’s jacket (which looks like a prealchemization of the cairo overcoat) is a bad thing

007967 the path they’re walking on to the plot hole looks like yaldabaoth

007973 it goes from yellow/red to black and white, why is that

007974 “VRISKA: This thing is some sort of juju.
VRISKA: As I’m sure you know 8y now, jujus are magic items that can do all sorts of things. 8end time and space, trap souls inside them, stuff like that.
VRISKA: The more potent jujus tend to 8e pretty versatile. I dou8t even he knew the full extent of its powers.
VRISKA: He supposedly got this thing as a 8oon for slaying a very powerful denizen. As if the guy even needed any more sick endgame rewards. ”

007978 “ Oh well, you decide to graciously disregard the one and only plothole in this elaborate tale. In fact you think you will use your dark sorcery to make it – POOF – disappear! Ha ha, what problem?

You are so excited for this side quest to begin. It’s going to be almost as delightful as it is thorough, and almost as thorough as it is relevant.” seeing as the object(?) known as the “plot hole” appeared on the previous page, and was said to have radically different properties after one use, this could be important.

007979 “You retrieve your adorable amphibious arms from your RAG OF DEMONS. And in doing so you reveal them to be adorably grasping the dreaded CROOK OF FRAILTY. No young salamancer should dabble in the dark arts without one.

You twirl the grim cudgel in the air and begin to disturb ancient spirits from their slumber. In spite of necromancy’s notoriously bonkers FAKENESS ATTRIBUTE, you begin to cast a spell!”

007980 “You beckon a horrifying cadre of skeletal friends. They lurch from the mounds to serve their dark master. You’re so happy to see them. You start to blow some sinister friendship bubbles.

You look at all these skeletons and think to yourself, this is probably going to be really important later on. Because that’s what happens in adventures. A thing happens, then you forget about the thing for a while, but it turns out to be important down the road. Like some heroes will be fighting a bad guy, and things will look bleak for them. But then out of nowhere this skeleton army will arrive as reinforcements or something, thus turning the tide of battle. Then you go, ah-ha. So that’s why that little salamander summoned those skeletons. Everything makes sense now, and in retrospect is elegant in its simplicity.

((mind control thing))FUCK YOU!!!!!!!! ((mind control thing))

Please, don’t interrupt. We are trying to enjoy an important subplot.”
1. that’s the plot to lord of the rings 2. this is possibly the only way you could leave it completely ambiguous as to whether this is actually going to be important 3. vriska is talking to hussie via mind control?

007981 hussie ignores vriska’s repeated fuck yous

007982 “VRISKA: OHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: OH FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
VRISKA: WE’RE G8ING TO LOOK AT WH8T’S IN THIS CH8ST RIGHT N8W!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: DO YOU HE8R ME Y8U F8CK?
VRISKA: I D8DN’T SCRAPE AND CLAW MY W8Y 8ACK TO RELEV8NCE F8R THIS SHIT!
VRISKA: I’M DOING S8METHING F8CKING IMPORTANT! AND WHEN I DO SOMETH8NG FUCKING IMPORT8NT, EVERY88DY 8ETTER D8MN WELL PAY ATT8NTION TO ME!!!!!!!!
MEENAH: (wut)
ARADIA: 😀
VRISKA: YOU DON’T TH8NK I’M ON TO YOU 8Y NOW? AS IF I C8N’T SENSE WH8N SOME SORT OF 8ULLFUCKERY IS AFOOT????????
VRISKA: YOU DON’T THINK 8’M WISE TO YO8R FUCKING G8MES????????
JOHN: (who’s she talking to?)
ARANEA: ::::?
ARADIA: 😀
VRISKA: GO AHEAD! TRY AND FUCK W8TH US SOME M8RE!
VRISKA: MAKE MY D8Y YOU PI8CE OF SHIT!
VRISKA: EVERYONE HERE WANTS TO KNOW WH8T’S IN THIS CHEST, SO THAT’S EX8CTLY WHAT THEY’RE GONNA SEE!
VRISKA: THERE’S PRO8A8LY SOME IDEAL WAY FOR ME TO REVEAL THIS THING TO M8KE IT SEEM AS COOL AS POSSI8LE, 8UT Y8U KNOW WHAT!
VRISKA: I DON’T GIVE A F8CK!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: I’M JUST G8NNA DUMP IT OUT ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE AND NOW!”
no one else in this scene has any idea what’s going on. meanwhile, vriska might be self aware.

007983 “VRISKA: THERE!
VRISKA: FUCKING TH8RE!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: TAAAAAAAA DAAAAAAAA!
VRISKA: W8W WILL YOU LOOK AT TH8T!
VRISKA: IT’S THE FUCK8NG TREASURE!
VRISKA: LOOKS LIKE SOME K8ND OF HUMAN HOUSE SHAPED THING! H8LY SHIT, DIDN’T SEE THAT C8MING!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: NOW EVERYONE HOLD YOUR FUCKING H8RSES WHILE I ARTLESSLY EXPLAIN SOME MORE SHIT A8OUT IT!
VRISKA: WOOOOOOOO! HERE FUCKING G8ES!”

007984 “VRISKA: AFTER THE GUY USED IT THAT ONE TIME, IT 8ECAME TOTALLY INTANGI8LE! SO WE CAN’T TOUCH IT OR PICK IT UP!
VRISKA: THAT’S WHY WE 8ROUGHT ARADIA ALONG! SO SHE CAN MAKE IT LEVIT8 OR WHATEVER!
VRISKA: IF WE 8RING IT NEAR HIM IT’S SUPPOSED TO ACTIV8 AGAIN OR SOMETHING! THAT’S HOW YOU USE IT AS A WEAPON I GUESS!
VRISKA: 8UT THAT’S ALL I KNOW!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: THERE! YOU LIKE TH8T YOU FUCK?
VRISKA: DO YOU LIKE HOW I JUST TOOK THE FUCKING PISS OUT OF TH8T COOL MYSTERIOUS TREASURE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
VRISKA: DO YOU LIKE GETTING OWNED????????
VRISKA: 8ECAUSE THAT’S WHAT YOU JUST GOT! OWNED!!!!!!!!
VRISKA: SO WHY DON’T YOU SUCK IT!”

007993 “VRISKA: If you really wanna plunge your fist through some sort of hole in reality, then 8e my guest!”

008004 ok but with the plot hole what if someone threw a pumpkin in

008015 “You’re not gonna take the wand because obviously magic is fake. Come on. What sort of buffoon would try to wield that thing under any circumstance?”

008129 green spiral

008144 homosuck. a lot of the text in this implies that caliborn has read homestuck. but that could be explained by calliope’s writing. also this is not the theory i’m trying to find evidence for so yeah. (although that could imply calliope has read homestuck, which seems interesting but also kind of unlikely)

008145 “A YOUNG MALE CHERUB HAS ACHIEVED TOTAL DOMINATION OVER HIS QUEST. THUS UNLOCKING HIS MAGIC MYSTERY PLANET. AND THEREFORE. GAINING SUPREME MASTERY OVER ALL EVENTS IN REALITY. CANONICAL OR OTHERWISE. ”

008161 it’s the thing from the intermission. never thought that would actually be used

008169 “WHY HORSES. IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE IRONIC OR SOMETHING. THAT THE VERY OBJECTS FALLING OUT OF THIS BOX. WOULD BE IN THE PROXIMITY OF SOME HORSES? I DON’T GET IT.”

008180 “TG: then she zapped us to that stonehenge place
CG: OH YEAH!
CG: AND JOHN WAS THERE.
TG: yeah
TG: we all landed in some grass like a pile of fuckups
TG: and then
TG: damn
TG: then what happened
CG: I DON’T KNOW. ” i think we still don’t know what happened here

008181 “GA: I Am On Record As Once Having Facetiously Likened It To A Magical Witch
TG: but witches are already magical arent they ”

008187 someone pointed out the yellow glitches on this page that don’t seem to match up to anything in the scene

008194 “ROXY: busting out tha MAJYYXXX! prayin up a storm to the holy wizardchrist they aint fake… ” and then she makes the perfectly generic object appear

008221 “DAVE: how do we make it so it can damage him
JADE: it needs a special ingredient
JADE: something which represents his only known weakness, but hasnt been properly weaponized ”
“DAVE: now what is this special ingredient and where do we get it
JADE: i already have it right here
DAVE: oh yeah?
JADE: in fact ive had it for about as long as i can remember
JADE: it was right under my doggy snout all along”

008222 special ingredient is cueball

008223 sword is lpos aka caledfwlch

008229 “JADE: when you cast healing magic on a zombie or dracula they die!” magic is jane’s, also karkat and kanaya are both sceptical about this

008236 karkat can no longer be revived by jane again

008263 “JOHN: it’s something else. something i got when i stuck my hand in a magic thing.
ROSE: A magic thing? ”
“JOHN: like i’m not fully a part of reality anymore, or bound by the rules governing it. ”

009279 “ARQUIUSPRITE: Never mind. I have triangulated your location and velocity using long range sensor technology, and probably also some sprite magic ”

008283 “JADE: since you have obviously been identified as the one who must deal english his fatal blow we will need to make sure you are battle ready ” also jade has zilly sword but doesn’t seem to understand its importnace

008304 “JOHN: ok, so i stuck my hand in this little magic house, and… ”
“JOHN: like, some kind of surreal, history altering… reality hopping… magic power. ”

008309 “ROSE: Threads leading to the most fortuitous outcomes have gotten so badly tangled.
ROSE: I can’t tell if it’s the hangover, or if something else is happening.
ROSE: Something out there…
ROSE: Unaccounted for.
ROSE: Why can’t I see it?
ROSE: Why have I become so blind again?” possibly john doing his thing

008344 “DIRK: I’m only as real as your ability to believe in me.
JAKE: (But i do believe in you.)
JAKE: (I believe in everybody!)
DIRK: Yeah right.
DIRK: You’ve never really believed in anyone your whole life, and you know it.
DIRK: Everything’s always about you. Don’t you remember? You already had this epiphany, dingus.
DIRK: I could only become truly real if you ever managed to harness those bomb as shit hope powers she mentioned.
DIRK: Then again, if you actually did that, you wouldn’t even need my help. ” brain ghost dirk
“JANE: Brain Ghost Dirk sounds almost as fake as he is completely made up. ”

008351 “ROXY: so i built this sick pyramid deal to help focus my brain chi and spiritual majyyks and if at all possible to blitz my chakras out the yin yang”

008355 “ROXY: i dont have grand illusions that this yarn you spinll be like some actual efficacious tutelage on fuckin pajama spells ” also johnroxy 4 lyfe

008356 “JOHN: blah blah POKED MY HAND INSIDE blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah UNSTUCK IN CANON! ”

008394 “I WILL JUST MAKE UP MY OWN. IT WILL BE A GREAT OPPORTUNITY. TO FLEX MY POWERFUL *WORLD BUILDING* MUSCLES FOR YOU TO BE DAZZLED BY. ” back to homosuck

008395 loshit looks remarkably similar to where hussie was last seen (and killed). it has green mountains and a blue castle.

008396 also horses

008397 “THE ALPHA MALE’S REIGN OF ADVENTURE BEGINS HERE. ON THIS ROOF. OVERLOOKING AN ENCHANTED CLIFFSCAPE. HOST TO INNUMERABLE GORGEOUS STALLIONS.

HOW IRONIC. THAT HIS VERY DEPARTURE. WOULD BE IN THE PROXIMITY OF SOME HORSES. WHAT. YOU DIDN’T FOLLOW THAT? JUST THINK IT OVER.

THINK IT OVER.”

008404 this page where john can’t control the floating partial wooden-looking horse object is very reminescent of that bit in roxy’s wizardfic

008438 gamzee has the ring

008440 and is being mind controlled by a serket. probably aranea from what is revealed later

008448 aranea no

008484 aranea’s healing is white/grey apparently. looks hopeful, which could be because she’s doing it on jake.

008492 white angels coming out of the hopesplosion. this may or may not be a problem.

008493 angels kind of resemble davesprite

008503 the hopesplosion broke arquiusprite’s glasses for some reason. also the power is over 9000

008528 this kind of resembles somethign to do with black holes.

008541 being knocked out by the power of hope un-grimbarks jade. possibly because while knocked out she is not under mind control

008552 the clock says just, and she stays dead. but it looked like it was going to be in the middle, only the serket 8 eye thing appeared over the space symbol, and the words “Lucky 8r8k!!!!!!!!” appeared. which kind of indicates aranea had control over it?? which is weird but that was not a just death

008568 “ROXY: ur a filthy liar
ARANEA: I’ve 8een known to em8ellish now and then. ” any exposition from aranea is suspect

008575 still don’t know what this thing is doing here.

008581 right before the stage thign appeared the spiral turned bright yellow which kind of reminds me of serenity

008590 brain ghost dirk is very nearly not fake

008591 “DIRK: You can’t sense what ain’t real.
ARANEA: 8n’t real?
ARANEA: It seems to me that you are quite real, Dirk.
DIRK: That’s because my buddy Jake just helped me become a whole hell of a lot less fake.
DIRK: You see,
DIRK: He believes in me. ”

008616 “CALLIOPE: i coUld Use some of my potent anti-sleeping majyyks on yoU to see if yoU wake Up.
JADE: anti sleeping magics?
JADE: i mean majyyks?”

008617 “JADE: callie…
JADE: there is something very familiar about you
JADE: are you sure weve never met before?
CALLIOPE: i’m qUite sUre.
CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly have remembered meeting yoU.
JADE: but you did know my name…
CALLIOPE: well, yes.
CALLIOPE: i knew OF yoU.
JADE: hmmm
JADE: i cant shake the feeling that we have spoken before
JADE: maybe in an old dream i cant remember?
JADE: im not sure if its the sound of your voice or what
JADE: i dont recognize your face, but then thats not what you really look like is it?
CALLIOPE: no.
JADE: …
CALLIOPE: before yoU ask, my actUal appearance is mUch less appealing, at least in my own view.
CALLIOPE: i woUld rather yoU didn’t see it, if that’s alright.
JADE: thats fine!
JADE: its not a big deal
JADE: if its true that weve met before, im sure ill remember in due time
JADE: lets not worry about it for now
CALLIOPE: okay.
JADE: by the way
JADE: what is with this stage?
JADE: is it from one of your memories?
CALLIOPE: no.
CALLIOPE: i thoUght it was yoUr memory?
JADE: i dont think so
JADE: it would seem to be some sort of imaginary figment that turned into a real object
JADE: i wonder why it looks like a drawing? ” dead dream jade from forever ago mentioned she had loads of friends

008619 it’s entirely possible there is something dead inside that building

008703 a god teir death clock with the hope symbol on, probably because jake just died. it’s flashing in god tier (like the level up things) colours and there is no discernable brave or just sides

008705 jake revives

008723 the image of skaia falling into lava

008725 it may actually be skaia? or affecting it? becuase that looks like lava falling into skaia (wait. wasn’t the frog supposed to be at the bottom of the volcano. the volcano which’s lava the skaia thing is currently being engulfed by.)

008726 it is skaia. the clouds say jack/pm are taking jade to her quest bed, which may or may not work. also karkat and kanaya have their weapons out.

008730 rose has one of echidna’s needles!! (magic?)

008732 the “spell” is hope-looking, kind of.

008752 wow. i finally finished my homestuck reread. wow.