re: not wanting kids

petitetimidgay:

i’ve seen a lot of pushback against “kid hating” lately, so let me just say a few things:

  • i don’t particularly like kids
  • they make me uncomfortable
  • the idea of being responsible for the physical and emotional well being of a child freaks me out
  • being pregnant is incredibly unappealing to me
  • i wouldn’t want to screw up my kids or scar them in any way with my shitty parenting
  • i don’t want to have to organize my personal/professional lifestyle and finances around my children for 21+ years
  • i just don’t want kids

but

  • i would never be mean to children
  • i love other people’s kids
  • i completely understand why other people want children
  • i’m fully aware that many others struggle to conceive and i would never disrespect or belittle that pain
  • i don’t think less of anyone for wanting kids

the idea that people who don’t want kids are inherently selfish, uncaring assholes is a lazy, misogynistic attempt to shame people (primarily women) for prioritizing personal goals and self care above parenthood. Choosing to have children doesn’t automatically make you more kind or selfless or fulfilled than people who don’t. Wanting to remain childfree is not the same as “hating kids,” nor does it mean you’re a horrible person. It’s a personal choice like everything else, so can we please stop being shitty about it?