Signs as things my Physics Teacher said.

aries: “Stand up Gabe, I’m setting your desk on fire.”
taurus: “I don’t care who’s condom it is, put it away.”
gemini: “Whoever wrote mitochondria as the most important thing you learned in science raise your hand I know there’s more then one.”
cancer: “No don’t ask Jesus for help on your quiz if you didn’t study, not even Jesus can help you now.”
leo: “Would anyone like to donate clothing to put on our class skeleton, it makes me uncomfortable he gets to be naked in this class but I can’t.”
virgo: “No I’m not grading your tests I’m trying to sell my world of Warcraft account. That’s what happens when you have kids.”
libra: “Don’t marry anyone named Mia. Most likely she’s only marrying you for a visa trust me.”
scorpio: “Oh really does it say your a loser on your birth certificate too?”
sagittarius: “I may have accidentally sent a very personal email to one of your parents that was suppose to go to my mom.”
capricorn: “Which one of you hell beasts stole my almond chocolate off my desk?”
aquarius: “No Gabe, Bill Nye the science guy isn’t a documentary.”
pisces: “Do I look like I would keep dead rats in a jar?- Don’t answer that.”