karkat works at subway in deuteraggregate and hes pretty fucking confident in his theory that the universe is Conspiring Against Him to make sure he gets really close to dying but never quite actually doing it
hes had to be saved by his superhero best friend from criminals of varying degrees like three times this past month- terezi says she doesnt mind, but karkat doesnt like feeling like a dead weight- and now this asshole in a cape just had to save him from being crushed by falling debris during his lunch break!! what has he done to deserve this. literally what the fuck, universe??
meanwhile dave is wondering why this troll subway employee he just saved is screaming nonstop