collegestuck

swamp-wizard:

john

• has no idea what hes doing. came to school for computer science, dabbled in music for a while, now hes somehow gotten roped into studying medicine? the boy just wants to do card tricks
• his grades are pretty decent too which is why its so weird that he keeps bouncing around. dad is v supportive tho
• member of the school improv comedy troupe

rose

• started out in psychology but REALLY wants to switch to creative writing but shes holding off bc she doesnt want to be That Girl
• works part time at the starbucks in the school bookstore. does horrifying latte art
• posts bizarre, holzerian “art installations” on campus but theyre actually all just repurposed dril/wolfpupy/etc tweets

dave

• photography major. casual interest in archaeology but happy w his major and never really considered anything else
• basically a campus celebrity on yik yak/snapchat
• sells weed to freshmen. no he doesnt. its a baggie full of oregano

jade

• physics major, honor student
• the same age as everybody else but has way more credits under her belt due to hoarding ap credits. she was home schooled too she just wrestled those fuckin tests into submission
• she trains therapy dogs, shes on the rifle team, everybody expects her to be super cool and sophisticated but shes also in the anime club and she barks at people

jane

• business major, and shes fucking good at it too bc she is this adorable little chubby girl with an overbite who talks and bakes like your grandmother but she is a cutthroat fucking genius and by the third semester everyone in her bba has heard her name and is fucking terrified of her
• i feel like she would be in the college republicans. i know nobody wants to hear this and i dont like it either but the evidence speaks for itself. she idolizes ron swanson. shes a libertarian AT LEAST. im sorry
• anyway she makes the most mind blowing edibles u have ever tasted

jake

• what the fuck is he studying? nobody knows. but hes on the football team and hes really big and so nobody cares. he is extraordinarily talented at colliding with people at high speeds
• hes involved w a lot of extracurricular activities tho (other than sport ball). does a lot of volunteer work, esp with kids
• took a film class once bc he needed the fine art credit but couldnt take it bc he loved every movie he watched so much he couldnt say anything critical about them

roxy

• computer science major and sorority sister
• used to be a big party girl, now is the designated driver. was fairly legendary for winning crash and compile with a blood alcohol level of .18
• on the varsity league of legends team

dirk

• computer science/philosophy dual major. wants to die every day of his life
• overloads his schedule every fucking time just to prove he can do it. has already been hospitalized at least once
• president of the anime club. he rules it with an iron fist and so nobody stays except for jade. ive posted this headcanon before
• in a fraternity as a social experiment