Omg, can you imagine???
“Car been used as a battering ram by Captain America? We got you covered.”
“Facing roof damage caused by falling debris? We got you covered.”
“Forced to shut down business for the week due to road closures from the latest Iron Man vs. Doombots battle? We got you covered.”
“Lawn and structural damage due to the Hulk? We got you covered.”
And so on…
[VIDEO: Parody sketch from the night Tony Stark goes on SNL. He is wearing a truly terrible cardboard version of the Iron Man suit and “flies” into the scene by jumping onto a box and posing with his arms out in front of him.]
TONY: “I’ve got great news for you, gang!”
“NATASHA” [played by Kate McKinnon in a bad red wig]: “You’ve closed the space portal and prevented the universe from ending?”
TONY: “No, I just saved a bunch of money by switching to Geico.”
“CLINT” [played by Colin Jost in a purple T-shirt, carrying a Nerf bow and firing little foam darts toward stage left]: “But Tony, you’re already gazillionaire!”
TONY: “Yeah, because I do smart things with my money like switching to Geico.”
CARDBOARD BUILDING: *is pushed over by stagehands, falling humorously next to Tony*
TONY: “Boy, I sure hope they had renters’ insurance!”
MAYHEM: “I’m a damaged Iron Man suit, falling out of the sky, right in front of your car.” *crashes onto road, car swerves into ditch*
MAYHEM: “I’m Captain America’s shield, ricocheting off of an extra-dimensional portal.“ *crashes through apartment window*
MAYHEM’S ACTOR, ANSWERING DOOR AT HOME: “Yeah?”
LOKI: “I will, with absolutely no guile or deal-making whatsoever, give you a million dollars to pretend to be Thor’s hammer if you do the accent.”MAYHEM, NEXT DAY: “Verily, I am Mjolnir, Hammer of the Thunder God, Which may only be moved by the righteous and worthy, and I’m blocking the Starbucks drive-thru. Looks like Karen in her Suburban didn’t see me.” *Karen’s truck flips over and lands on another vehicle, coffee cups flying everywhere*
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