Some people hate Homestuck because they think it’s about a boy who just stands around in his bedroom. I will not try to tell these people that they are wrong, but at least with my help they can easily lie to their friends by pretending that they have actually read Homestuck and enjoyed it.
Here are some choice plot points from acts 1 through 6, in no particular order:
- Mark Twain is killed by a newborn baby dual-wielding flintlock pistols
- Somebody chops a meteor in half with a sword
- One of the villains builds a tall building full of staircases just to torment a guy in a wheelchair
- About 90% of the characters are time travelers
- Somebody attacks a planet by dropping a moon out of orbit
- A video game destroys all life on Earth
- One of the characters makes Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff
- Charles Dutton can see into the future
- A god shows up and literally juggles a bunch of planets
- A Prohibition-era mobster plows through a wall Kool-Aid Man style
- The whole universe blows up
- A completely different universe also blows up
- The author jumps into the story and engages in melee combat with the devil himself
- The creators of the universe track down the main characters to scream at them over the internet
- Betty Crocker lands her alien spaceship on Earth
- There are dinosaurs
I apologize for how much was left out of this summary. By the time it reaches completion, Homestuck will be longer than Leo Tolstoy’s famous novel War and Peace. If anyone wants to try writing a better summary, I wish them luck.
A) I think you mean one of the *heroes* builds a tall building full of staircases to torment a guy in a wheelchair
B) well I guess she IS a villain, but
C) she’s definitely one if the heroes… I think…
D) okay I think this got weird but then again it was already weird with her
E) the funny thing is she’s not even like an antihero, she’s literally trying to be a hero
F) my phone just autocorrected “hero” to “jerk” in that last bullet point and if that doesn’t just summarize her I don’t know what does
I’m so glad that your thought process 100% mirrored mine
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