Seligman Who wins: You But don’t fucking do it. Don’t fight Seligman. The dude shocked some puppies and cried, you think he can punch a person and hold it together? You’ll win, but it won’t feel like it.
Freud Who wins: You Fight him. Punch that sexist, mother fucker right in the dick. Get wrecked, Freud.
Harlow Who wins: Harlow Jesus Christ don’t fight him. The dude literally named his own personal monkey hell arena “The pit of despair”. You’ll lose and all he’ll do is offer you a cold, empty, vacant metal hug.
Zimbardo Who wins: I don’t fucking know but please hit him UUUUggggh he’s so stuck up and fame seeking. Beat him up. While he’s going on about how your aggression emulates all of human nature you can roundhouse kick him right in that god awful goatee of his.
Lorenz Who wins: You But why? The dude just wants to mother some baby geese and smoke stuff with his old timey looking pipe. Let the man live a little.
Ebbinghaus Who wins: Ebbinghaus The guy locked himself away and forced his brain to memorize bat shit made up words. You don’t know what the hell he’s gonna do. Do not fight him.
Rosenhan Who wins: Rosenhan He fucking convinced sane people to commit themselves into mental institutions for science. He’ll probably talk you into stabbing yourself. For the love of god AVOID.
Pavlov Who wins: You? Why the hell do you want to fight Pavlov? He looks like a sad Santa Claus. What’s wrong with you? Leave sad Santa alone.
