OH MY GOD I FUCKED UP SO BAD.
I SAW THE CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY “BULLSHIT” SALE YESTERDAY AND BOUGHT IT THINKING IT WAS AN EXPANSION PACK.
IT’S LITERALLY BULL SHIT. THEY ARE SENDING COW POOP TO MY HOUSE AND I HAVE NO CLUE HOW I’M GOING TO EXPLAIN IT TO MY PARENTS.
Please for the love of god let this work
God I am so fucked.
It’s been 2 weeks since I made this post. Every day for those two weeks I found a way to wait for the mail. I sent friends to intercept the package, I used delay tactics to stop my parents from coming home around the time of the package, I waited for a solid 4 hours one day just waiting on my doorstep for the package to arrive.
Today I graduated from college. And guess what my father hands me as we get home.
He says “You got a triangle in the mail.” and walks off with the most knowing grin of my life. I don’t know if he actually knew, but my gut is telling me he’s held on to this box. He knew. He waited for me to fucking graduate to give me the greatest graduation gift of all time. He won. I was defeated.
And for those of you wondering if it’s actually poop.
Yes. Yes it is.
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