Me: *playing Tomb Raider*
Grandmother who is visiting for the weekend: Mind if I sit with you?
Me: *squirming slightly because there is gore and swearing in this game and my grandmother is a sweet old lady: Um, if you want to.
Grandmother: *sits* Thank you, dear.
Me: *continuing to play for about five minutes*
Grandmother:
Grandmother:
Grandmother: LOOK OUT THERE ARE THREE COMING DOWN THE HILL
Grandmother: THAT WAS POINT BLANK HOW ARE THEY ALIVE
Grandmother: OOOHH YOU MADE THAT EXPLODE
Grandmother: STOP KILLING MY GRANDDAUGHTER
Grandmother: KILL THEM KILL THEM ALL
Grandmother: OHHHHH YOU SHOT HIM IN THE HEAD OHHHHHHHHH
Grandmother: RUN RUN RUN YOU’RE ABOUT TO DIE RUN
Grandmother: OKAY NOW KILL THEM ALL
Me: *slowly turns to look at her* Grandma
Grandmother: *sweet smile* Hmm?
Me: Grandma oh my god
Grandmother: *more smiling* Well, hurry up and kill everyone else, I want to see you save this Sam person.
Me:
Me:
Grandmother: Kill them.