vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

So a common occurrence in vampire stories is that a vampire turns someone bc they were mortally wounded and could only heal if they became a vampire

So now I can’t stop thinking about a person getting mauled by a Bigfoot and a vampire finds them in the woods and turns them

But now whenever other vampires are dramatically revealing their angst transformation stories this one vampire is very quiet

“What’s their deal,” one of the others asks around the campfire.

All the other vampires chuckle and one f them says “you haven’t heard? They say they got mauled by a Bigfoot.”

Everyone bursts out laughing.

The Bigfoot Vampire stands up, “yeah I can get why that’s hard to believe…….we are LITERALLY fucking VAMPIRES Y’ALL.”

“ Hahaha well did you get a blurry photo of the Bigfoot?”

“WE don’t even SHOW UP in photos!!”